Sadiq aur Amin

Zindagi mein sirf ek kisam k logun se muhtat rahein. Chor, daku, khoni, darinday nahin balky woh safaid posh log ju apkay aur meray beech mein sachai ka labada auray jhoot bolte hein.

Yeh woh log hun ju Sach k alambardar bane phirty Hein aur inki Zindagi ka wahid Sach yehi hai ke yeh jhootay Hein.

Inko pehchane ka sab se asan tareeqa Inka takia Kalam hai ‘k mujhe jhoot see nafrat hai, mein kabhi jhoot ni bolta’

Jahan yeh fikra sunaye de wahan se apni izzat bacha k bhag lein. Kunkay aaj nahin tu Kal Inka yeh sachai ka labada apka kafan ban jayega.

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Dear Diary

It’s been a difficult year. I’ve never been a hopeless optimistic, but this year just this year I had alot of hopes. Career, relationship, growth. Almost in mid of the 5th month nothing makes sense.

My fault ? Letting my guard down, putting aside my ego for the some ungrateful people. As they say, as soon as you give them worth, you’re only left with hope. That they won’t use it against you.

Why do the people you care for the most, always have to hurt you the most?

Will ever this cycle break? Story of majority of us who are barely breathing strangled in this invisible shackle of people who we care for.

May 7th 2018

5:48 pm

How did you lose her?

How did you lose her?

“I didn’t”
I said with a bittersweet smile.

“I didn’t lose her because she was never mine. She almost was, but somehow she wasn’t.”
Deep breaths

“She has my mind, body and soul and still that isn’t enough”

“She could’ve loved me, you know. And I did love her, I think, as best as you can love someone who isn’t yours. But that was all a ‘could’ve’, not a ‘did’ ”
“And God, does that hurt”

“I am not sure how much I’ve lost, but she lost someone who cared for her more than anyone ever will”
Deep breaths

“If she had been mine, at least I would’ve gotten some clarity out of it, but she wasn’t. She wasn’t, so all i can think about is that she could’ve. That she almost did, and I think this hurts the most”
Sigh

“I was almost good enough for her, but not quite. She almost loved me, but somehow it all got screwed up. And I’ll never get as much clarity as I would’ve if I had gotten to call her mine. Because maybe then there would’ve been a definite reason. But instead I just keep wondering what I did wrong.”

 

“And it just hurts that we were so, so close to the finish line, but we never made it across.
never made it across.”

5:30 AM
13/08/2017

5:10 AM
13/08/2017

You

When I was 9 years old I began making a list of things that terrify me, and I started out writing things such as thunderstorms, bee stings, monsters, and darkness. As I grew older my list did, too and the things I fear now are entirely different; for death, illness, the unknown and, most recently, you are what now keeps me up at 3 A.M

If it makes sense, it’s not love

If its all flowers and gardens.
It’s not love, it’s infatuation.
If you’re swimming and still haven’t sunk
It’s not love, it’s fondness.
If you’re in it just for the smiles and laughter
It’s not love, it’s greed.
If you think its toxic, or the other person is.
It’s not love, it’s your hopelessness.
If you’re still afraid of falling
It’s not love, it’s your desire.

Love is hope, selflessness, commitment and above all conviction.
It has it highs and lows. And that’s how you know it’s real.

Maybe…you’ll fall in love with me all over again.
Hell,” I said, “I love you enough now. What do you want to do? Ruin me?
Yes. I want to ruin you.”
Good,” I said. “That’s what I want too“.

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